The 2014 6 Nations (Alternative) Awards

It’s been a helter-skelter five rounds of emotionally charged rugby, with heaps of highs (if you’re from Ireland or England) and lots of lows (if you’re Scottish or Italian). So, in an attempt to summarise it all in a 400 word blog, we’ve put together the following list of debatable accolades. Seven positive and seven, not so positive.

Firstly, the positive ones…

The Lumberjack Award – for the most players felled:

– Quintin Geldenhuys (70), with special mention to Dan Lydiate for coming a close second (66) – but not missing a single tackle.

The Go-Go-Gadget Arms Award:

– Joe Launchbury – for this:

Go Go Gadget Arms

The Slippery Eel Award – for most defenders beaten:

– Mike Brown – 25

The Leaping Salmon Award – for the most lineout takes:

– Courtney Lawes, with 34 – 28 of England’s ball and 6 steals

The Robin Banks Award – for most steals at the breakdown:

– Peter O’Mahony, with seven turnovers.


The Mexican Mule Award* – for the most carries:

– Jamie Heaslip – who got through 65 carries, clocking up 162 metres in the process

And the inevitable Player of the Championship Award:

– Mike Br … actually you can decide for yourselves here but there are no prizes for guessing who the England team are backing:

And now, the not-so-positive ones…

The Galumphing Giraffe Award – for taking the ball into contact as upright as, well, a galumphing giraffe:

– Sebastien Vahaamahina, who also came close to getting the next award…

The Bloody Butcher Award:

– Pascal Pape – for that pass.

The ‘Can You Smell What The Rock Is Cooking?’ Award – for the best wrestling move of the tournament:

– Owen Farrell – for this:

The Amir Khan Award – for getting his face in the way:

– Johnny Sexton

The Dunce’s Hat Award – for the worst discipline:

– Scotland – 60 penalties conceded

The Zinedine Zidane Award – for headbutting:

– Cian Healy

The Sam Burgess Award – for the best shoulder charge:

– Stuart Hogg – for this:

Stuart Hogg

And that about wraps up this year’s 6 Nations. Is there anyone else that deserves a mention? Post a comment below if you think we’ve missed anyone.

*Just to clarify, it’s a fake award – we are not insinuating that Jamie Heaslip is in any way connected to a Mexican Cartel, nor that he traffics drugs of any kind!


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